Trying Times and Just Trying To Get Through

It's officially Autumn.  This is one of my favorite seasons.  I love the beautiful fall colors.  This year is different for many reasons.  

Thanks to Covid, there aren't any fall festivals this year.  Obviously I understand why, but it's still a bit sad.  And even if they weren't cancelled, we would not attend during this time anyway.

This is also our first year in 4 years without high school football.  I thought I would miss it more than I do.  I do miss seeing my son in his uniform, but I am glad to have my Friday nights back.

And speaking of that son, he is now at Miami University and I miss him terribly.  They went back late due to Covid so while I do miss him, I am also happy that he is there and able to get on with his life.  It's hard on the kids to have so much put on hold.  I worry about his health, but so far he has been tested for Covid twice and has been fine.  Much prayers going up that things stay that way.

The other boys are still in school.  I wasn't sure how long the schools would stay open, but we have not had a significant surge in Covid cases so far, so they are plodding along.  I pray that it stays this way also.

All of my fall decorations are up.  Now if I could just get this house in order.  I was on a good track, but got sidelined by not feeling well (not Covid) so I'm back to square one.  Next week looks to be very busy, and then I have jury duty the last 2 weeks in October.  I am not looking forward to that.  But I was able to get out of it the last two times I was put on jury duty so this time I'm all in.  

I hesitate to even mention the election.  All I'm going to say that I'm praying fervently every day for our country.  And no matter what happens, I know that God is still in control.

Broken Computers Are The Worst

My computer broke.  It's actually been broken, but I could cobble up some ways to make it work, but even those stopped working.  My son thought he fixed it, but I think it's an inherent problem with the type of HP computer that I bought (several years ago) because when I Googled how to fix it, it seemed like a common problem with this particular model.  So I've been MIA all summer long.  But my son did fix an old computer that we found in our home office, so I'm back.  The next time I invest in a computer, I think it's going to be an Apple (sorry HP, but I've been burned enough).

So what has been going on?:

1.  The 7 year old played baseball this summer (social distancing baseball).  He loved it and had a blast.  He tries out next week for next years team, so we'll see if he makes it.

2.  We went on vacation!  We went on our usual summer vacation (I booked it in January before the pandemic).  We rented a condo, went to the beach, didn't eat out, didn't go to the pools, and social distanced while wearing masks anywhere inside.  It was just so nice to get away.  

3.  School starts soon.  The little goes back August 17, the middle goes back August 27, and the oldest was supposed to go to college August 10 but it got pushed to September 14 but classes begin August 17.  I am not sure how this is all going to go or even if anyone will actually return to a classroom setting.  I hope so because these kids really need it.  But on the other hand, I'd like to keep them home in a bubble.  I'm so torn.  I don't think there are too many good decisions here.  No matter what happens, it will be less than ideal.

4.  Other than that we are staying in, social distancing and doing the best that we can. 

I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this broken computer doesn't break again.  I had to buy the college student a new laptop for school, and I just can't afford another one right now.  But I can't update here from my phone and I miss updating.  No one but me reads this (according to the analytics) but this is kind of like my diary.  And I especially wanted to keep it updated during these unprecedented times.

It's the Last Day of Distance Learning

It's the last day of distance learning and I have mixed emotions about this.  I'm sad that my son missed out on the end of the year with this class and teacher.  But I'm kind of glad that this distance learning is over.  Although the school did their best with a bad situation, I'm just not sure how effective this has been.  It's hard to learn via iPad.  Most of the worksheets should have been printed out, but I could not do that because of the app the school used.  Doing the worksheets on the iPad was cumbersome.  And he got frustrated very easily.

Due to some of the CDC's guidelines for schools, I'm not really sure how this is going to go in the fall.  Going through an entire school year with partial in school/partial distance learning is going to be disruptive/ineffective in my opinion.  I have to seriously think about how we are going to handle this.  But I don't know if homeschooling is the answer either.  These are troubling times for sure.

I do plan on keeping up with his studies over the summer.  I already told him that we will be doing extra studying and reading.  And he already told me that he's not going to do it.  This should be fun.  The strong willed child vs. the no patience mother.  Good times.

It's May

New month, new hope.

Ohio is starting to open up again, slowly.  This makes me happy and wary at the same time.  I'm not one to rush out and do "all the things", but it gives me hope that the end is in sight (at least the end of the constant need to quarantine).  I'm not planning on eating out but I will still order in once in a while.  Churches are supposed to start opening up, at least for daily mass, on May 25.  I will be interested to see how they handle everything.  Some directives were sent to our priests and one of them posted them online but it still leaves room for each parish to do what they feel is best, as long as it agrees with the states mandated guidelines.  I miss church so much.

Patios for restaurants open this week.  That's great except that it's 37 degrees and snowing here in Ohio.  While eating out on a patio would be a dream, right now I'm going to have to take a hard pass.  This weather is just the pits!  I swear that Ohio's weather is still stuck in March when we first quarantined.  Maybe Mother Nature will start opening up again soon too.  I am ready for warm weather.  I almost NEED it at this point.

Salons open up this week!  I already have my hair appointment scheduled for May 23.  My hair stylist is in one of those new "salon loft" type buildings so she has her own room with a door on it.  It will be just her and me...wearing masks...fixing my horrible gray roots.  I haven't heard from my nail salon yet.  That one I'm a little leery of going back too.  Everything is out in the open and I'm just not sure how comfortable I am with that.  So that one I may wait on a little longer.

I'm still planning on doing "pick ups" at the grocery store.  I really miss grocery shopping and picking out my own items.  But it's not the end of the world and we have made this work for 2 months.  I think I can make it work a while longer.

But while I won't be rushing out and partaking of everything, the soft openings give me hope.  I feel like there is a light at the end of this dark tunnel.

And speaking of "the end", next week is the last week of distance learning.  The kids are surely happy about that.

Moving Forward

Even though we are stuck here in quarantine land, life still has a way of moving forward.

We signed the oldest up for college the other day.  He's registered and his meal plan and room and board have been chosen. He'll be attending Miami University in the fall (at least that's the plan.  We'll have to wait and see what the Governor does about schools opening).

This was NOT an easy decision.  He actually had another college in first place on his list.  He originally wanted a small, Catholic college environment, but his first choice did not come back with enough scholarship money and it was almost $10,000 more per year than his other choices.  We, as his parents, just could not justify paying that much more when we still have two other children who are planning to attend college also.  It broke our hearts to say no, but we have to put the whole family first.  So he moved on to his second choice.  And he is extremely excited!  He is also relieved that he has a plan and is excited to move forward with his life.  I am excited for him!!  I think he will do well here despite the fact that it's bigger and not Catholic.  There is a Catholic church right by campus and he can attend mass, adoration, and confession and they also have ministries that he can join (if his schedules allows).

So while we are house bound for the moment, the future waits for no one.  Even the pandemic can not stop completely the forward trajectory of our lives.  Right now, it just seems that way.

The mixed emotions I have right now are incredible.  I can not imagine my baby leaving our home.  I've dreaded this for 18 years.  But I know it's why God gave me this child in the first place.  It was my job to teach him to fly and it's also my job to let him do that.  Oh it is so hard though.

Ever since this pandemic started, I have been on the verge of tears.  Silly things make me cry.  But now that college is looming in front of us, it's even harder not to wear my emotions on my sleeve and tear up at every little thing.  And while I'm dreading his leaving us, I'm also so very excited for him and can't wait to see where his future leads.  I know God has a plan for him and I'm looking forward to watching his journey.

And I suppose this is all a part of my journey too.  It's one that I'm hoping to embrace with grace.  I guess this is just another thing that I have to put in God's hands.

Quarantine, Coronavirus, And Life As It Is Now

I think we are on day 17 of distance learning.  Maybe day 27 of being home and quarantined.  The days do run together.

I really haven't been out yet except to go to my son's Xolair appointment at Rainbow's again.  My sister in law put two N95 masks in my mailbox so we felt fairly safe.  But it's still unnerving and I noticed that we were both exhausted when we got home at 11:00 am.

We are still doing "YouTube" mass.  I'm not sure we will change that even if churches open up May 1st.  I so miss my church and receiving the Eucharist.  But I think it's too soon.

You know how you can tell how serious I am about it being too soon?  I bought a gel nail kit from Amazon.  I am NOT planning on going to the salon anytime soon.  And my grays are coming through quite nicely at this point.  And I don't even care.

The Governor did decide that the kids will continue distance learning and not go back to school is school year.  Apparently the fall is up in the air too.  I'm glad they are not going back right now.  But possibly not going back in the fall is making me uneasy and definitely sad for my son that should be a college freshman in the fall.  I'm sad all around for him.  He's missing his friends and missing going to the gym which is how he reduces his anxiety.  What about graduation? Prom?  I guess we'll have to wait and see.

Getting food is a bit easier.  There's been more delivery and pick up options (I am not going into a store unless I absolutely have to).  Getting gluten free items has been hit or miss but so has chicken breast, chicken sausage, and lettuce.  I'm guessing that supply chains are having issues getting things out.  We are doing fine and have had no issues so far.  I'm even getting T.P. from Amazon, so that's an extra bonus.

The weather here is not the best.  Cold, rainy, snowy, are just a few words to describe Ohio right now.  I have been getting out and doing my  3 mile walk as often as I can.  When it's too rainy, I try to do something inside.

We are here.  We are good.  It's not the same, but we are trying to adjust the best we can.  I hope and pray you are also.

I Don't Know What Day It Is

I'm not really sure what day this is of the quarantine.  Day 18-19-20?  I just know that we are following the "Stay At Home" order from Governor Mike DeWine and we have been Distance Learning for almost 2 weeks now.  So I think that means we've been social distancing for 18 days but it's all such a blur.

Distance learning is going fine.  I could do better, but we are doing ok.  I set up a schedule for the seven year old today so he's not playing Nintendo Switch for 12 hours a day.  But it's hard.  What else is there to do?  It's sunny and 55 today but it's been cold and rainy the last several days.  Even today, it's so windy that I felt like I was walking through a wind storm on my daily walk.

The daily walk.  The daily walk is my saving grace.  I don't know what I'd do without that little reprieve.  I need that to clear my head and try to keep my stress levels down.  I have to keep reminding myself to "put it in God's hands".  But I do better at some times vs. others.  I'm trying.

The high school has the older boys on a pretty good schedule and I don't really need to do much there.  But I know the separation from friends is very difficult for them.  It's especially difficult because not people are following the social distancing guide lines.  That makes me the "bad" guy because I will not yield on this issue.  I wish I could fix this for them and make it better, but it's out of my hands and clearly in Gods.


Even more difficult then social distancing is keeping them in food.  I do not want to set foot into a grocery store if I don't have to.  I've been trying to use pick up or Instacart delivery.  I don't like the fact that Instacart adds $30-40 dollars to my weekly grocery bill with fees and tips but I really don't like exposing my family to the corona virus either by visiting stores which appear to be packed every day.  We are fine on food and there is no issue there, except that I have to shop weekly and the amount that I'm spending is causing me massive stress.  But these boys can eat!  And I don't know what to do.

I miss church.  I miss mass.  I miss receiving the Eucharist.  We are a little over one week away from Easter and I can't wrap my brain around the fact we will not have Easter Sunday service.  We are watching mass on YouTube, but it's a small consolation.

I'm not even going to touch on the fact that I have a high school senior this year and prom, graduation, even college in the fall are all in jeopardy.

I am thankful that right now, we are all healthy.  We have a safe home, food, and I scored some toilet paper from Amazon the other day.  We have each other (even if a child who shall remain nameless is mad at me right now).  Our extended family seems to be healthy (even if they are putting themselves at risk by not following the social distancing requirements as well as they should be).  I'm thankful that spring is on it's way and not winter.  At least we'll be able to get outside on a regular basis soon enough.  I'm thankful that we have this time together.  It's uninterrupted and that 's what I had wished for (less sports, more family time).

So for right now I'm going to focus on all the positive (and I'm going to stop on-line shopping so much).  I'm asking God to protect all of us and if you are reading this, that includes you.